Some items in the news recently (and my opinion about it):
News: David Copperfield was alleged to have raped a Seattle woman thereby having his Las Vegas house raided by police.
My View: David, the slogan isn't, "What happens to a Seattle woman, stays in a Seattle woman." Ah, it's all just a big trick anyway.
News: Legendary mime, Marcel Marceau, passed away a few weeks ago at the age of 84.
My View: Poor guy. He led such a quiet life.
News: NFL Roger Goodell sent a memo to all NFL teams prohibiting home team cheerleaders from parading around in front of the visitors’ sideline. He says it distracts the team.
My View: Roger just takes all the fun out of the game. Now Bill Belichick will have to video tape them.
News: Joey Bishop, one of the original members of the Rat Pack died on the 17th of October.
My View: Although long preceded by the death of his career, when it comes to the Rat Pack, Joey had the last laugh.
News: Kid Rock arrested after Waffle House brawl.
My View: You know you're getting old when… Actually I blame the establishment. They give everyone a carafe of coffee and then wonder why people are on edge when someone takes the last drop of Boysenberry syrup.
News: Researchers have identified a group of genes that not only prevent cancer but also slow the aging process in worms.
My View: PETA will be ecstatic!
Monday, October 22, 2007
Thursday, August 16, 2007
First Thing First
Elisha Cooper wrote, quite possibly, one of the best opening lines of any book ever published: There’s a head sticking out of my best friend.
This line, from the book: Crawling: A father’s first year, is Mr. Cooper’s humorous, touching account of fatherhood in the first year of a baby’s life. I have never met the man or spoken to him, and I am not getting any endorsing fees in any way. I just wanted to tell you that this book is a wonderful read for any man about to become a father
My little girl, Prudence, was born on Saturday, June 2. Fatherhood has pretty much taken over my life with a vengeance. I quickly realized that the tiniest of things this little girl does has a bigger impact on my life than anything I used to worry about before. Things just don’t matter as much as they used to when you have a child.
“The freaking check-engine light came on in the car today,” I said as I entered the house from a long day at work. “That means I have to write a check to make the engine light turn off. Sheesh, I’m just so aggravated. Like we can afford this crap. Not to mention I don’t have the time—“
“Honey, she smiled today for the first time,” my wife interrupted.
I quickly deflated.
“Aw, really?” I said. “I want to see. Make her do it again,” as if Prudence were a circus act.
I find myself anxiously anticipating all of her many firsts as she grows from babyhood; her first smile, the first time she rolls over, her first haircut, the first time I stand before a judge for beating the shit out of her boyfriend.
It’s a long road from childhood to adulthood and I’m so glad to be along for the ride. I just hope the check-engine light doesn’t come on.
This line, from the book: Crawling: A father’s first year, is Mr. Cooper’s humorous, touching account of fatherhood in the first year of a baby’s life. I have never met the man or spoken to him, and I am not getting any endorsing fees in any way. I just wanted to tell you that this book is a wonderful read for any man about to become a father
My little girl, Prudence, was born on Saturday, June 2. Fatherhood has pretty much taken over my life with a vengeance. I quickly realized that the tiniest of things this little girl does has a bigger impact on my life than anything I used to worry about before. Things just don’t matter as much as they used to when you have a child.
“The freaking check-engine light came on in the car today,” I said as I entered the house from a long day at work. “That means I have to write a check to make the engine light turn off. Sheesh, I’m just so aggravated. Like we can afford this crap. Not to mention I don’t have the time—“
“Honey, she smiled today for the first time,” my wife interrupted.
I quickly deflated.
“Aw, really?” I said. “I want to see. Make her do it again,” as if Prudence were a circus act.
I find myself anxiously anticipating all of her many firsts as she grows from babyhood; her first smile, the first time she rolls over, her first haircut, the first time I stand before a judge for beating the shit out of her boyfriend.
It’s a long road from childhood to adulthood and I’m so glad to be along for the ride. I just hope the check-engine light doesn’t come on.
Tuesday, February 27, 2007
The Cheating Poem
The price you pay
For the pleasures of flesh
Can be related to
The intensity of thresh
It may cost you dearly
Perhaps your life
If you were caught
With another man’s wife
But if you find
It works out
Where she manages
To divorce her lout
It won’t be him
Whom you’ll be dreading
When she says, "I do."
At your wedding.
For the pleasures of flesh
Can be related to
The intensity of thresh
It may cost you dearly
Perhaps your life
If you were caught
With another man’s wife
But if you find
It works out
Where she manages
To divorce her lout
It won’t be him
Whom you’ll be dreading
When she says, "I do."
At your wedding.
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